David Hines (hradzka) wrote,
David Hines
hradzka

in which my dog is stupid

DOG. "Hey, Boss, I'm running! Look at me running!"
HINES. "Good girl. You run your bumpers off."
DOG. "Wow! Look at THIS!"
HINES. "Honey, that's a fire ant nest. You don't really want to -- NO!"
DOG. "OH BOY! It's soft and fluffy!"
HINES. "Well, I suppose this is one way to learn."

DOG. *jumps up and runs away, leaving a streaming trail of ants*
HINES. "There you go. See, I told you -- "
DOG. *runs perimeter of field, pulls high-G u-turn, dives back onto fire ants*
DOG. "This'll teach 'em!"
DOG. *flops on fire ants, looks satisfied*
HINES. *shakes head*
DOG. *leaps to feet and starts running again*
HINES. "Look, that's twice now. Don't you think that --"
DOG. *dives face-first into milling fire ants*
HINES. *facepalm*
DOG. *sits up*
DOG. *facedirt*

HINES. "Look, I *told* you."
DOG. *shakes head, gives fire ants a dirty look*
DOG. *races away and starts pedalling in a circle on the ground like Curly of the Three Stooges*
HINES. "Will you at least let me pick them off you now?"
DOG. "yes please boss."
Tags: critters
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