David Hines (hradzka) wrote,
David Hines
hradzka

APED: "rise of the kildar"

Oh, come on. Y'all had to know this was coming.

Mike is Ghost, a Navy SEAL.
(OH JOHN RINGO NO.)
Bad terrorists some co-eds steal.
(OH JOHN RINGO NO.)
Mike gets the girls back, once they're nude
trains some subs and stops a nuke
and he gets mom's permission, too!
(OH JOHN RINGO NO.)

Mike goes to Georgia, God knows why.
(OH JOHN RINGO NO.)
And buys a caravanserai.
(OH JOHN RINGO NO.)
He fills it up with guns and whores,
Then rescues him some teenage girls.
"Clean 'em, fuck 'em, make 'em yours!"
(OH JOHN RINGO NO.)

Cottontail's a Killer Whore.
(OH JOHN RINGO NO.)
She hates all men, and hates Mike more.
(OH JOHN RINGO NO.)
To take apart the sex slave scene,
They make her part whore, part machine:
Mike turns her into Whoreverine!
(OH JOHN RINGO NO.)

Mike's the Kildar, it's his job
(OH JOHN RINGO NO.)
to let the virgins ride his knob.
(OH JOHN RINGO NO.)
One gets inside his heart and head
but then the Chechens kill her dead
so Mikey makes 'em eat some lead!
(OH JOHN RINGO NO.)

Mike's all sad and broken up
(OH JOHN RINGO NO)
He's mooning like a lovesick pup
(OH JOHN RINGO NO)
The terrorists are back, he's told
he foils their plots with steel that's cold
and topless, cute, fourteen-year-olds!
(OH JOHN RINGO NO.)

That's Mike's story. Now you know.
(OH JOHN RINGO NO.)
But how far will John Ringo go?
(OH JOHN RINGO NO.)
Will Mike's new playing fields all have grass?
Will Cottontail peg Putin's ass?
Just wait until the next book, class!
(OH JOHN RINGO NO.)
Tags: a poem every day
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