burger_eater requested "A riverboat gambler who is somewhere other than a riverboat."...dude, GREATEST PROMPT EVER.
Well, my friend, I'm a riverboat gambler.
And at gambling I sure ain't subpar.
No stranger to winnin', my pockets were brimmin'.
I had cheap women, cheaper cigars.
Then one day I met her -- I'll never forget her.
she sold me a map to the stars,
and so all these years
I've been stuck way out here,
a riverboat gambler on Mars.
Now on Mars there's no one to gamble.
But I lost the map, so I can't leave.
And Mars ain't got no water,
though you'd think that it oughtta,
and this thin air's a mite hard to breathe.
She said she came from here,
and that I should come here,
'cause the two moons are pretty to see.
But I can't forgive her,
'cause there ain't no rivers,
so what the hell does that make me?
I'm still a great riverboat gambler,
even though I'm stuck out here on Mars.
There's no riverboats,
but they say that hope floats,
so I'll ride on that under the stars.
Still, I'd trade something dear for a bottle of beer
and a couple of ten-cent cigars --
And I'd like to be known as
what I'll die alone as,
a riverboat gambler,
(just a riverboat gambler)
a riverboat gambler on Mars.
