David Hines (hradzka) wrote,
David Hines

APED: "friggin' in the (serenity) riggin'"

I appear to be in a musical mood this week. mymatedave requested a poem about Joss Whedon's FIREFLY, and my thought was: hey, you know what the fandom really needs? A filk of "Friggin' in the Riggin'!"

Our firefly, Serenity
offers fine amenities
big swinging dicks,
and bouncing tits,
and pansexual identities!

The Captain of our vessel
says he likes to wrestle
with pretty girls
in baby oil
the hell he'll go to's special!

(cho.) Friggin in the riggin'
wankin' in the plankin'
masturbatin' in the gratin'
there was fuck-all else to do!

Inara's always screwing
And when that's what she's doing
Mal gets drunk,
Jayne's in his bunk,
and Kaylee is me-too-ing!

Zoe's husband's her joy
("Shave off that moustache, boy!")
and for her part
she won his heart
with dinosaur-shaped sex toys.

Jayne's true love is Vera
at night he brings her near-a.
When he explodes
and shoots his load
it's loud enough to hear-a.

The Doctor's fond of pleasure
and Kaylee's got his measure --
what took so long
for Simon's dong
to get between her nethers?

The engineer's a cutie.
Kaylee knows her duty:
strapped on a cock for
our good doctor,
did him in the booty!

The doctor's sister's crazy
but River is a daisy
she'll watch her brother
fuck another
girl when she gets lazy!

The shepherd's hair is scary
it startles the unwary
his pubes so thick
they hid his dick
when he took River's cherry!

And me? I'm Wash. I fly things.
My hands can make controls sing --
a leaf on wind
we've landed in --
Tags: a poem every day
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