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David Hines [userpic]

back from the gun show

July 26th, 2009 (05:14 pm)
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I recently got a Twitter account (as hradzka, natch). My phone can't make Tweets, which is a shame because I went to a Virginia gun show today and discovered that I kept thinking of potential Tweets while walking around. It would be silly to dump them on Twitter all at once, so you get them here:

-- The gun show was in two buildings. The one I parked by was empty, disappointing. Then I went to the other: BEST GUN SHOW EVAR.

-- Man, that first building had a lot of Hitler busts.

-- You can always find Confederate and Nazi stuff at gun shows. Lots of gun nuts are disturbingly into guys who got their asses kicked.

-- Is this how the lefties on my flist feel at their rallies when they see the Communist Youth diggin' totalitarianism?

-- ...who'm I kidding? Half my flist is helping them *hand out brochures.*

-- Absolutely beautiful high-end miniatures by AeroArt, Inc. Made in Russia. The painting is unbelievable.

-- Also: Klan memorabilia!

-- Kidding. The Klan stuff was part of a race-relations history collection. Some very cool black history stuff in it, actually.

-- Neat photos of all-black military units. Hey, an emancipation letter.

-- Seriously, the first building was like this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oUkVYauZWHg

-- Some very cool US militaria.

-- OMG, some sick motherfucker chromed an M1 carbine. I want to find him and cause him pain.

-- Lots of family operations. Curiously, the ugliest gun dealers tend to have *really hot jailbait daughters.*

-- One dealer tells me that the place is in two buildings for the first time. Usually, it's all-in-one. This explains why one place is packed and the other dead.

-- Brain immediately pegged young guy in wheelchair (double leg amputee) behind me at ATM as Marine, rather than Army. Why Marine? I wondered.

-- Thought about it. The answer: his haircut and his stump socks (Marine camo). Not quite "you have been in Afghanistan, I perceive," but not bad.

-- Speaking of, sign of true fanboy: sorely tempted to buy a Jezail rifle just because Dr. John Watson was shot with one.

-- Think I was cruised. He was young, overly friendly, and looked like something out of a military-themed shoot by Colt Studio.

-- Cruising at a gun show. THAT's cojones.

-- One dealer had a small placard saying no sale to anybody speaking something other than English at his booth.

-- The ATM, meanwhile, was so multilingual that it offered to speak to me in Polish.

-- Another dealer had a similar placard banning cell phones.

-- Grave disappointment at discovering cell phone jammers for sale to law enforcement and military only. Visions of uninterrupted movies shattered.

-- My first gun show where NFA items (i.e., suppressors and machine guns) were for sale.

-- LOTS of gorgeous machine guns. Asked if they had trouble, after the shows, wiping off all the drool...

-- Sign most likely to make a non-gun-nut do a doubletake: "Investment Grade Machine Guns.

Without question, the most awesome item there: an old Schutzen rifle, *gloriously* engraved and carved, with amazing detail on the gun itself and on the stock. The right side of the gun featured an engraving of a woman aiming the rifle; the right side of the stock showed the same woman holding a cup of some sort. The guys who had it just got it, but they'll be putting pics up on their website. They thought the picture on the stock showed the woman holding a stein, but it didn't have a handle, so it would've been a goblet with a top. I think there's a good chance it was a shooting trophy, making it a woman's rifle. Be insanely cool if the woman depicted was the woman who'd originally commissioned the firearm...


Posted by: Vvalkyri (vvalkyri)
Posted at: July 26th, 2009 10:59 pm (UTC)

NFA? And what is Marine camo vs Army camo?

Posted by: David Hines (hradzka)
Posted at: July 26th, 2009 11:26 pm (UTC)

NFA = National Firearms Act. Tightly regulates full-auto weapons and silencers. You can get 'em, but they're subject to a $200 tax. And a background check, cavity search, etc.

The quick way to tell the difference between the current pixelated camos: Army camo doesn't have black; the Marines camo does.

Edited at 2009-07-26 11:27 pm (UTC)

Posted by: Jayman (smjayman)
Posted at: July 27th, 2009 12:31 am (UTC)

Dood, the one in Chantilly? I was there, handing out flyers for Silver Eagle Group most of the day!

Posted by: David Hines (hradzka)
Posted at: July 27th, 2009 12:50 am (UTC)

HA! I must've walked right by you a couple of times.

(I remember going past the table with a bunch of Silver Eagle Group and thinking, "WTF is that? NO TIME. MORE GUNS TO SEE.")

Posted by: Jayman (smjayman)
Posted at: July 27th, 2009 01:04 am (UTC)

Yeah, we're there to promote the range and training facility, and not to sell guns as much. :) Shame I didn't know you were around, could've at least stopped you to say hi!

Posted by: gchick (gchick)
Posted at: July 27th, 2009 12:41 am (UTC)

If you can send text messages, your phone can twitter -- you need to pair the phone number with your twitter account at the twitter website, but after that, just text to 40404.

Posted by: David Hines (hradzka)
Posted at: July 27th, 2009 12:49 am (UTC)

You would *think* that, wouldn't you? And yet...

(It fails to set up with my phone. This is probably because my phone is old and sucks.)

Posted by: Joe Morrison (argonel)
Posted at: July 27th, 2009 12:52 am (UTC)

What would be glorious would be if the engraving was of the woman who won the rifle. I think that would make a very good grand prize. Win the tournament and win this rifle engraved with your likeness.

Posted by: David Hines (hradzka)
Posted at: July 27th, 2009 02:11 am (UTC)

Oh, hell yeah.

Eric Clapton auctioned off some of his shotguns a while back, and at least one of them was engraved with a picture of him playing guitar under a tree. *That* is being rich: you can have your picture engraved on your (expensive) shotgun.

Posted by: sharaith (sharaith)
Posted at: July 27th, 2009 01:09 am (UTC)

Sounds like lots of fun! (Apart from the Hitler busts, that is.) I wonder if they have gun shows like that here... I don't think so, though.

Posted by: David Hines (hradzka)
Posted at: July 27th, 2009 02:07 am (UTC)
H. Beam Piper

Yeah, you guys have gun shows just walking down the street.

The busts were actually really surprising. Lots of guys sell the WW2-era daggers and ribbons and such, historic guns, but actual busts of Hitler was a new one on me. I can't imagine they sell too many of 'em. What're you gonna do, give der Fuehrer a pointy red hat and stick him in the garden? Can't really show it off to company, either.

"Hey, what's that over there?"
"Oh, that's my bust of Hitler."
*awkward silence*

Posted by: Richard D. Fox (rdfox)
Posted at: July 27th, 2009 02:35 am (UTC)

I dunno, if he's cheap enough, I'd use him for target practice.

But then, the first time I ever went to a range, they handed me a target with Osama's face on it, so...

Posted by: sharaith (sharaith)
Posted at: July 27th, 2009 07:13 am (UTC)

Every day is a gun festival in the Galillee Division!

(It's just too bad we only have two kinds of guns.)

I was in a gun exhibit by chance a couple weeks ago, thought of you and took some crappy cellphone pics - haven't got a chance to blog them yet, but keep an eye out! ^^

Posted by: David Hines (hradzka)
Posted at: July 29th, 2009 02:42 am (UTC)

Gun pictures -- hell, IDF life pictures -- always welcome! Extra points if you're making bunny ears on the UN guys.

Posted by: HJ (hjcallipygian)
Posted at: July 27th, 2009 02:06 am (UTC)

No mention of the interesting item that you texted me about?

Posted by: David Hines (hradzka)
Posted at: July 27th, 2009 02:09 am (UTC)

Sorry! I forgot the Thermite!

...well, there's something that's not said often outside of Special Forces circles.

Posted by: HJ (hjcallipygian)
Posted at: July 27th, 2009 02:12 am (UTC)

That and Terminator episodes. =)

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