APED: "donald duck doesn't wear pants"

Donald Duck doesn't wear pants.
Mickey wears shorts, that I know.
But Donald Duck doesn't wear pants:
he prefers to hang free down below.
Some call him a sleaze, but he's pleased by the breeze
that ruffles his feathers right down to his knees,
and the girls like his moxie, and the Scotch he decants,
so Donald Duck doesn't wear pants.

Mickey Mouse doesn't wear shirts.
He covers his crotch and that's all.
Mickey Mouse doesn't wear shirts.
He's bare-chested right through the fall.
Some girls would forbid, or send on the skids,
one who hikes up his pants till his nipples are hid,
but Minnie does like it, and oh! how she flirts!
so Mickey Mouse doesn't wear shirts.

Bugs Bunny wears nothing at all.
All that he's got he lets show.
Bugs Bunny wears nothing at all.
Disrobing he'd find far too slow.
He'll put on a dress to steal a caress
from Elmer, who gives him one, under protest --
but when they take the bedroom, the dress stays in the hall
and Bugs Bunny wears nothing at all.